We do not possess the future

The novel ought to be a stout defender of the independence of eschatology in its most robust sense – that is, a defender of the apparently obvious but actually quite vulnerable conviction that the present does not possess the future. Rowan Williams Dostoevsky: Language, Faith, and Fiction

I was reading Ben Myers posting of a quotation from Rowan William's new book. For those less familiar he is the current Archbishop of Canterbury. This quotation really caught me and has started a train of thoughts including that often forgotten passage "continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." (Phil 2:12-13). Relationships are unpredictable and you cannot possess another person nor a relationship. We do not possess the future, nor eternal life as such. These are graced gifts to us and as yet not fully received.

Søren Aabye Kierkegaard as Johannes de Silentio was author of Fear and Trembling and this book has been on my reading list for quite a few years. Kierkegaard was a Christian existentialist reflecting very much about the emptiness in the life of the church around him and struggled with the tensions between faith and reason. In Fear and Trembling he studied the story of Abraham and presented two figures a "Knight of Faith" and a "knight of infinite resignation". The Knight of Faith relinquished everything i.e. was willing to kill Isaac, but also trusted that he would receive him back. This trust was based on the "strength of the absurd". Absurdity is contrary to reason and all faith is viewed as basically absurd. In contrast the knight of infinite resignation gave up everything in return for the infinite. Within this view he hope he may receive redress after this life, and yet continuously dwells with the pain of his loss/sacrifice.

Perhaps you understand my propensity to the Existentialists. Kierkegaard as Silentio seems to admire Abraham's faith, but he is unable to understand it. I live in and understand the tension between the two knights. The present does not posses the future, rather it is held in trust.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Cor 13:11-13