professional success and the cost

Would you exchange a tremendous professional triumph for a severe personal blow? Dave Brooks New York Times

Sandra Bullock's success with an Oscar and that great acclaim that it brings is contrasted with her personal life and marital failure. Even larger salaries and endorsements and possibly a longer life as Oscar winners tend to live longer. Getting my hair cut, it was noted I don't have any gray or white hair. When asked I said that I think it's because I don't worry so much especially about the need to make money and have things. A woman in the salon started on about how surely more money means you'll be more happy. Well a few people chipped in. One hair stylist asked if I exercise and meditate, which is what I do. But then I was asked if I was Buddhist. I said No I'm Christian. The conversation died into silence? Why?

Research according to Dave Brooks shows that once the basic necessities have been met then income is only lightly connected to well-being. In fact lottery winners tend not to be happier rather sadder with greater problems. Yet don't we also long for more money? If we apply Maslow's hierarchy of needs to our glasses it is interesting that Brooks says "According to one study, joining a group that meets even just once a month produces the same happiness gain as doubling your income. According to another, being married produces a psychic gain equivalent to more than $100,000 a year." The need to belong being met contributes far more than having stuff and possessions and money.

Christians do forget where to lay up their treasures. We need to see the world in a different light. Workaholism and striving for personal success are real, very real. To pursue these has a real cost. The alternative is we all need to enjoy the present moment and the little blessings and not lust after the big things.

The other side of life

I'm learning more about the other side of life. Mothers book hotel rooms for their sons and their girl friends so they can sleep together, I suppose. But why? If mother is comfortable with the idea why not at home? Fathers are happy for their sons to sleep with whoever they want, in fact they think it normal. Yesterday while getting my hair cut, two women were talking one recommending a certain young woman to the other's escort agency.

I realized it is possible to be so sheltered that the rest of the world, the rest of life has no reality. How am I to be in the world and not of the world?