Absence

I haven't posted for a couple of weeks as the preparations for International Christmas took over my life together with a number of other events. But this is on my heart.

The Purpose-Driven Life has a lot to be responsible for in this world both good and bad. The worse is that it encourages task-driven people to be even more task driven. The problem for task driven people is that the task frequently takes priority over being loving and being just. I am constantly challenged and saddened by the lack in supposedly Christian organizations, especially churches. I continue to be find heartache listening to cruel and unloving behaviour in the face of the command to love our neighbour as ourselves. Why do you, we, behave so badly?

There are two judgments or sorting into eternity. I like CS Lewis' image in The Last Battle where all come to Aslan and those who recognize him carry on through a door to a new Narnia while the rest cannot see this new country. This is the sorting of those who know God and don't know God. The second judgment is an accountability of what has been done with and in life. Those in authority with power or influence are more accountable than those with little or no resource. This second judgment is not really based on what we have successfully achieved but more on our faithfulness. Have we cared, fed, given shelter, visited etc? It is about our heart response to situations.

As we head into 2009 I really do pray that in a time of recession we find even more love for those around us. Treating people as valued by God and not things or tools or resources.

Zimbabwe, a human tragedy

In a country with the terrible distinction of having the second highest proportion of orphans in the world — one in four children has lost one or both parents — the closing of schools and hospitals is hitting these most vulnerable children mercilessly. Celia W. Dugger New York Times

A few weeks on and cholera continues to spread and more human suffering. Cholera victims are expected to pass 60,000 and travel to neighbouring countries. Sadly the Information Minister Sikhanyiso Ndlovu called the cholera outbreak as a "genocidal onslaught on the people of Zimbabwe by the British". Meaningless words casting blame and no action.

Inflation officially hit 231 million percent in July, soldiers rioted because their wages were useless. Teachers have abandoned their jobs to find food. Hospitals are closed for lack of supplies etc. There isn't enough clean water to treat sick patients. Zimbabwe is being described as turning into a "failed state". "The situation is truly grim. One man and his cronies - Robert Mugabe - are holding this country hostage," Mr McGee US Ambasador.

What is a failed state? Well some criteria are as follows.

• a state whose central government is so weak or ineffective that it has little practical control over much of its territory,
• legitimate authority to make collective decisions has been eroded,
• reasonable public services can not be provided,
• widespread corruption and criminality,
• refugees and involuntary movement of populations,
• sharp economic decline,
• failed interaction with other states.

The Fund For Peace's Failed States Index is very interesting for 2008. Zimbabwe is third behind Somalia and Sudan. The Uk is 160th, USA 161st and Canada 167th.

It is interesting that much of repentance and Faith involves the admission of weakness, failure and need for strength and resource beyond self. This is the realm of faith. looking into transcendence. Here religious leaders say pray that Mugabe step down, Mbeki former South African Prime Minister asks to a power sharing and in the waiting more die. Is there any point when a nations sovereignty can be violated because that state has failed in it's care of its citizens. I don't know but how can I avoid meaningless words. Perhaps people like Bonhoeffer had a better idea?

The elders

The signing of the 15 September agreement raised hopes in Zimbabwe and around the world, but the failure to implement it in good faith and create a workable power sharing government is leading to despair and accelerating the crisis. Regardless of the challenges in implementing the agreement, all parties should now make the welfare of the people their first priority and put an end to the unnecessary suffering of millions. Jimmy Carter - Elders in South Africa

The Elders, former United Nations Secretary-General Kofi Annan, former United States President Jimmy Carter and international advocate for women's and children's rights Dr Graça Machel have completed their assessment even though denied entrance to Zimbabwe itself. My own struggles pale into nothingness when I read and follow the reports.

We knew when we planned this trip that the situation in Zimbabwe was serious. What we have learned in the past few days is shocking. It is not just the extent of Zimbabwe's humanitarian crisis, but the speed of deterioration in the past few weeks that is most worrying. The scale, depth and urgency of the situation are underreported. Kofi Annan

It seems to me that if things could take a turn for the worse they have. The basic infrastructure is now collapsing so sanitation and safe water are no longer available and cholera is looming as an epidemic. Perspective is such an important thing for me. A global vision is essential to put often our petty little worries into an appropriate scale. Our backyard should be the world. We don't need anymore more proof that people's greed and hunger for position and power is always bad. I still wonder what happened to government as servant of the people.

There are those who are the elder statemen and women who have in their latter years maintained honour and service such a Annan and Carter and those who just want to hang onto their own little territory like Robert Mugabe.

Why do the wicked live on, growing old and increasing in power? Job 21:7

Declutter and clean up

You're a very busy packrat - you don't enjoy living among clutter, but you're just too busy to deal with it. You can't delegate the job to someone else you're the only one who knows what needs to stay and what can go. Swamped Stockpiler Kijiji declutter day

kijiji has declared today National Cleanup Day in the US. Doing the quiz I confirmed that I am 'swamped stockpiler' and the description is highly accurate. I'm however a slightly happier one. After a really difficult September and October, I finally met with my spiritual director after a 5 month break as she was traveling extensively. I do believe I 'm a bit depressed and probably Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) though normally this doesn't happen until February. But this summer was pretty rainy and a lot of other things this Fall have compounded things to make life pretty difficult and definitely dark for me.

Strange though once you know you're a bit depressed things are a little better because I found I wasn't living in the emotion as much. Also I had quite a few of the symptoms:

• A change in appetite, especially a craving for sweet or starchy foods
• A drop in energy level
• Fatigue
• A struggle to go to bed and a tendency to oversleep
• Difficulty concentrating
• Irritability and anxiety
• Increased sensitivity to social rejection
• Avoidance of social situations and a loss of interest in the activities you used to enjoy

Anyhow I've increased my meat intake and I'm eating more spicy food. I also noticed how dark my apartment was because I hadn't replaced burnt out light bulbs. I bought one daylight full spectrum bulb for the light fixture above my desk where I spend 90% of my awake time at home. I feel a little better but this maybe placebo effect, anyhow I probably need even more of those special light bulbs.

Bill Hybels wrote the book with a classic title Too busy not to pray. I know to my cost that getting the praying bit right is important and got back to journaling in October, and Spiritual Direction this past week. The prayer life of a person or a community is a thermometer of health. The individual's personal time with God and communal time with others. With the latter I am not merely talking about corporate sunday worship, nor fellowship but the need for another human being who listens and prays with us. I am currently mourning the loss of my Tuesday evening biweekly prayer meeting and at the same time pleased to have my spiritual director back.

Today I struggle again to clean up, to assert order in the aspects of my life. To bring light back into the dark corners. Back into the fray called life.

Remember him [Your creator]—before the silver cord is severed, or the golden bowl is broken; before the pitcher is shattered at the spring, or the wheel broken at the well, and the dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it. "Meaningless! Meaningless!" says the Teacher. "Everything is meaningless! Ecclesiastes 12:6-8

health and health

It's the curse of modern life. We eat too much and don't take enough exercise to burn off the calories. ... If this trend continues, by 2050 nine out of 10 adults and two thirds of all children will be overweight or obese. ... Obesity is the biggest health challenge we face. British Health secretary Alan Johnson

Over 2.4 million Canadians suffer from diabetes and up to six million more have prediabetes. If not treated one quarter of the six million will have diabetes within three to five years. In the UK it is predicted that by 2050 , 90 percent of adults will be obese. Physical health is linked to spiritual health. Laziness is both a physical and a spiritual one. Spiritual gluttony and physical gluttony are real problems, in fact sin.

In an earlier posting I pointed to John Cassian who mentioned gluttony as a problem for monks but spiritual gluttony is also an issue. St. John of the Cross, in The Dark Night of the Soul tackles spiritual gluttony. He explains that it is the disposition of those who, in prayer and other faith acts are always in search of sweetness, which we might call the emotional high. Spiritual gluttony occurs when people do spiritual or religious things because of some consolation or delight they get from the activity and so the pleasure becomes the end of the action instead of God. The greatest issue comes with novelty and newer is better thinking because the assumption is that the new thing gives more pleasure than the old.

There is also a very real danger of spiritual obesity or spiritual diabetes for this generation. In the obsession of worship and prayer with emotional highs and pleasure and it's associative newer is better we are in danger of being consumed by our own sugaryness. Richard Foster suggests in Freedom of Simplicity rather than going into worship in a place one rather should bring worship into life. "Have you ever tried to live out your day so that you fill each moment with the thought of God? I do not mean you cease normal activity. Oh No! Just the opposite. bring God into each activity, infusing it with divine Light." We need to take both our physical and spiritual lives seriously. Even eating can become a spiritual activity, one of worship.

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sister, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Rom 12:1

Packrat or Hoarder?

I follow a couple of key sites which keep me uptodate with a lot of things. I'm a great fan of Lifehacker.com which introduced me to a few special deals and offers available. Some of my productivity tools were introduced to me through their entries. Check off is a todolist which syncs with my iPod. Google calendar synced with iCal which in turn also syncs with my iPod but also Using Pagepacker I produce a tiny little booklet based on one sheet of paper which includes my weekly events plus monthly calendars, a quick phone book and a myriad of productivity sheets.

Today I was reading my other favourite Apartmenttherapy.com. A post called help my husband is a packrat caught my attention. Of course I had to read the appeal for help and the 23 comments/advice. I know I'm a packrat because it's genetic - all my uncles and aunts are and most of my cousins are too. I hope this isn't libelous. Well thats until I read one comment which suggested there is a difference between packrats and hoarders.

Packrats [and those hoarders who don't have severe illness]can sometimes be convinced to sort and store their possessions in an organized fashion, as long as they don't have to get rid of their stuff. ... An organized hoarder or packrat is someone I could negotiate with, but dirty habits (unwillingness to throw away real garbage) are issues that ultimately ruin relationships. I hope yours is just a hygenic packrat!

Now I'm not sure whether I'm packrat or hoarder. I hate waste and things thrown away. The borderline is when someone's garbage is really your treasure or is it still garbage. I can get rid of things and give things away. In fact I collect things like bikes to give away and collects things towards projects in the future. But the problem is When am I really collecting garbage? For example my computer monitor speakers came out of the garbage. Well actually the last 3 sets have. The best set are a pair of Roland MA8's which work perfectly and have real depth and clarity but I have given away numerous sets rather than hoarded them.

But as a new immigrant I do have hoarder tendencies. With the recession round the corner these tendencies are likely to become more pronounced. I'm pleased that I can ride pass interesting things on the curbside and also turndown certain offers. I have started casting an eye over things regarding quality, value, usability, and condition as part of the consideration but it's still difficult.

Living life more simply has it's challenges and whether it is packrat or hoarder they are real challenges. It's not the collecting, rather whether we use them. "Packrats that collect or hoard for no good reason might need therapy. Packrats that collect for love or investment or other real reasons may need a reality check or storage or organization help, but it doesn't automatically make them mentally ill."

I wonder about our spiritual practices. There can be a danger that we simply collect them and do them and they fail to lead to good habits and ultimately virtuous living. They are the ends rather than the means to an end. In a review of authors lists of spiritual disciplines which I did, I was surprised to see journalling in several lists. I recall reading something by Kenneth Leech author of the classic Soul Friend. In the article, he critiqued the idea that spiritual direction should become a profession and also the idea that journalling is a spiritual discipline. I'm inclined to agree with his issues especially as journalling becomes a discipline instead of one method or a device to aid the Examen, which is a review of the presence and absence of God in daily, weekly and monthly life. The device has become the end not even the means which is concerned with the Spirit.

This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty. Zechariah 4:6

Opinions and authenticity

Do you remember the James, Brother of Jesus Ossuary box? It did a bit of a world tour! It was proclaimed as a first century a limestone bone box that could have contained the bones of James, the brother of Jesus. On one side of the ossuary was carved “James, son of Joseph, brother of Jesus.” We have to note all these names are common James (Jacob), Joseph and Jesus (Joshua) were all fairly common among Jews at the turn of the era.

Then the Israel Antiquities Authority (IAA) appointed a panel by a unanimous vote claimed that it was forgery, something faked. Now some 5 years later it finally came to trial in Israel and now we find there is original ancient patina in the word Jesus and that it wasn't an unanimous vote. Firstly several simply did not vote , they abstained and others voted on the basis of another scientist's expertise which they did not have the skills to assess. The verdict is still out but the accusation of forgery is much weaker.

Authenticity is something very precious but at the end of the day it's based on evidence and opinions. It is provisional awaited better evidence or refuting evidence and even then it remains opinions. There is a lot of taste and see to it all.

I'm currently rereading Richard Foster's Freedom of Simplicity and today it seems a very different book to that which I read over 20 years ago and even 5 years ago. It tastes very different because I'm different. I am searching for simplicity, order out of my personal chaos. The insights are much sweeter and more sour. Avoiding living a legalism and not confusing poverty and simplicity. Perhaps a significant thought from it is this -

God is not the author of confusion ... when we live out of the divine Center, thoughts and decisions flow from the Fountainhead ... We will have no need to reverse our decision if the winds of opinion change, for we have spoken out of a deeper reality than the latest Gallup poll.

It's a matter of having God at the centre and being attentive. It is less "God coming into us to our coming into God." Whether a life lived in attentiveness to God is good and satisfying eventually boils down to opinions. But these opinions need to be rooted in personal validation.

Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the person who takes refuge in him. Psalm 34:8

sometimes you wonder

THE PEACE OF WILD THINGS

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.
— Wendell Berry

Our world, our environment , where we live and what we eat affect us. A recent US study found autism rates were higher among children who experienced higher rainfall in their first three years of life. This research is based on child health and weather records from three US states, California, Oregon and Washington State, but British autism experts are quite condemning of the conclusions. This seems a strange correlation to put it mildly. Does this mean that everyone in the UK has a very high risk of autism? or people from the rain forests are more likely to be autistic? Perhaps its less about rain and more about West Coast life and environmental quality!

A more interesting piece of correlation research suggests that though there are significant differences in health related to income and social deprivation, when you live near a park, woodland or other open green spaces the differences are reduced. Sometimes you wonder what really makes sense and what doesn't. Rain and clouds make you emotionally depressed however autism is not an emotional condition. But an authentic association might be that green spaces have far reaching effects environmentally and emotionally.

I do believe increasingly that studying has its limitations and studying indoors at a desk or table has a deep implication. Philosophers and theologians have spoken of God's "two books." Bonaventura called them the liber naturae and the liber scripturae. Later Francis Bacon called them "the book of God's Words" and "the book of God's Works." The primary lesson of the book of nature is to convince us that God exists. God's second book, the Bible, then gets the picture of God into a greater sense of focus. However both are about thinking with the mind, lived lives and a sense of peace rooted in trust and divine relationship. A healthy way of living is to look at both, to experience both, and know that God created both.

When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what are mere mortals that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? Psalm 8:3-4

Green and green

One way to put the question that I want to answer here is this: why was it virtually impossible not to believe in God in, say, 1500 in our Western society, while in 2000 many of us find this not only easy, but even inescapable? Charles Taylor A Secular Age

Side effects isn't only a problem with drugs and pharmaceuticals. Being green has its side effects for example the new fluorescent energy saving bulbs contain heavy metals and require alternative disposal. The targets for the development of biofuels means diverting food and in particular grains and especially corn from human consumption to fuel production. This supposed trust in technology continues to frustrate me and is a residue of a human aspiration that human progress and technology will ultimately solve all problems. or perhaps even worse maybe humans are ostriches hiding their heads in the sand of denial of a problem.

Something a little more base has come up in our attempt to green things, fungi. In particular a Patagonian rainforest tree fungus naturally produces a mixture of chemicals that is remarkably similar to diesel. Not only that it doesn't use the valuable sugars and starches but cellulose which is that fibrous part of plants such as stalks and sawdust which we throw away. Strange it was more about going and finding than creating and having science or technology being involved. I suppose it is part of the older scientific tradition of collecting, observing and sampling - which is associated with wandering and wondering about the the world. I am reminded of the quotation attributed to Johannes Kepler.

"I was merely thinking God's thoughts after him. Since we astronomers are priests of the highest God in regard to the book of nature, it benefits us to be thoughtful, not of the glory of our minds, but rather, above all else, of the glory of God."

Perhaps what we have essentially lost is our wonder. That the natural world can actually give a sense of awe and wonder. What went wrong? Why can't people find motivation to change their attitudes and lifestyles? Charles Taylor continues in A Secular Age:-

…the salient feature of the modern cosmic imaginary is not that it has fostered materialism, or enabled people to recover a spiritual outlook beyond materialism, to return as it were to religion, though it has done both these things. …it has opened a space in which people can wander between and around all these options without having to land clearly and definitively in any one.

We're in real trouble, aren't we? The side effect of losing God and recovering a new spirituality is a new space and a new freedom. The trouble is we lost the freedom to think and the freedom to choose. Taylor see this as the Age of Authenticity where “each one of us has his/her own way of realizing our humanity, and that it is important to find and live out one’s own, as against surrendering to conformity with a model imposed on us from outside, by society, or the previous generation, or religious or political authority.” The rise of a new individualism and a new spirituality which is reactionary against traditional religion. Being true to oneself and authentically oneself in style and practice.

I'm left with wondering even my own spiritual practices are actually an expression of this movement in culture. Perhaps even yours or the abandonment of them? What can happen in our search for authenticity in this age of the individual self is lostness and the inability to truly commit. perhaps this is the source of my own acedia?

And now, O Israel, what does the LORD your God ask of you but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, Deut 10:12

All Saints and All Souls Days

[Word Studies are ] “to try to understand as precisely as possible what the author was trying to convey by his use of this word in this context.” Gordon Fee

Having been explaining what Halloween is (All Hallows Eve) for a few days - I've become sensitized to the difference between All Saints and All Souls. Strangely Sunday one service celebrated both All Saints on All Souls. It felt strange though I understand some churches have merged the two. So you don't understand? All Saints' Day (also known as All Hallows' Day) is a feast day on November 1st to remember all the saints (literally Holy Ones) and martyrs throughout history. All Souls remembers all the faithfully departed this life especially those who have passed a way recently, while All Saints looks to those who inspire and model the faithful life to us. Therefore the two events are contrasted by mourning and living life fully. We ought to understand the words and events in their contexts.

Joey whose blog I follow has been posting about the meaning of Biblical words with particular emphasis on context. He comments about Duvall and Hays comment that "we should always keep in mind the distinction between determining the meaning and discovering the meaning." He notes key issues from Duvall and Hays' book. Namely English-Only Fallacy - languages do not translate exactly on a one to one basis, Root Fallacy - dismantling a word doesn't give its meaning rather its context does (just think about aweful), Time-Frame Fallacy - the modern word doesn't really point to the original word (thus the greek word dynamis doesn't mean dynamite), Overload Fallacy - over using other usages to determine the meaning rather than firstly studying the context of use (different human writers were involved) , Word Count Fallacy - assuming studying word is a complete understanding of the subject, Selective-Evidence Fallacy - only using verses that support our position instead of recognizing verses that challenge or present an opposite (Paradox and tension are integral to faith).

But there is more when using a Christian author's particular point of view. Thinking changes positions over a life time and we may adopt an understanding which the author has altered or even recanted. One only has to realize that Rick Warren, the writer of The Purpose Driven Life has publicly confessed a major omission in his understanding of the church, i.e. that of justice and poverty. Also Bill Hybel of Willow Creek noting their lack of attention to discipleship. Probably most interesting change is the ultimate individualist philosopher Jean Paul Sartre not only became a convinced socialist but there remain rumors he became a Roman Catholic (But never proven).

It seems to me we necessarily are called to think and continue to think. To judge and weigh things and make decisions that lead to actions. People of faith need to study and think and to be constantly open to discovering meaning in the divine human relationship.

That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched—this we proclaim concerning the Word of life. 1 John 1:1

Please check your translation

"We must shift America from a needs - to a desires-culture. People must be trained to desire, to want new things, even before the old have been entirely consumed. [...] Man's desires must overshadow his needs." Adam Curtis quoting a US banker

Welsh is a difficult language in a country dominated by English however it is important to make sure your translation actually says what you think it says. Some local government officials in Wales wanted this notice translated as all signs have to be bilingual so sent an email request to the translation department and got this reply. "I am not in the office at the moment. Please send any work to be translated." They assumed that that what they got was No Entry .. etc. No-one checked.

In many situations we just don't check the translation. Whether it is spirituality, faith, studying the Biblical text, or what is our fundamental understanding of what exactly is the church and its purpose.

I having watched and thought about Adam Curtis' documentary series The Century of the Self has made this challenge even more focuses my thinking. Business and Politics use public relations to read and fulfill our desires to make products or speeches as attractive as possible to us. Curtis links this to Freud and the introduction of psychoanalysis to North American culture. Freud's identification of deep human desires have been developed into an out of control individualism. This is translated at its most dangerous into North American church culture in the meeting of people's need's (Here we should read human desires but not deepest.) Immediately we head towards advertising and programming and all the stuff that goes with individual wants. It is an externally imposed reinforcement of selfishness and self-centredness.

The conscious and intelligent manipulation of the organized habits and opinions of the masses is an important element in democratic society. Those who manipulate this unseen mechanism of society constitute an invisible government which is the true ruling power of our country.

We are governed, our minds are molded, our tastes formed, our ideas suggested, largely by men we have never heard of. This is a logical result of the way in which our democratic society is organized. - Edward Bernays

Edward Bernays, Freud's nephew saw happiness was more than just a way of selling stuff but it was also political way of control the people. By satisfying particular inner irrational desires people could be made happy and thus docile and controlled. In any case people have to consent to make democracy work and maintain a stable society. Therefore engineering consent is a good thing. The US government, big business, and the CIA developed ways to manage and create this consent. But then Wilhelm Reich, a pupil of Freud's, came to influence believing that the self did not need control but should be free for self expression. The freedom of the 60's was born except that this was hijacked and people now were encouraged to feel unique individuals and they needs things to express their uniqueness. Curtis contends that those with the power , whether Thatcherites or followers of Blair, felt they were creating a new and better form of democracy which responded to individual opinions. However these techniques were not developed to liberate people but a way of controlling them. The new left's appropriation nor translation does not remove the original issues. Curtis demonstrates this in both the rise to power of Bill Clinton and Tony Blair. In the documentary we are left with the real question of who is in charge. It seems like it is the power brokers. (first episode is here)

Israel was never meant to be monarchy. It should have been a theocracy but the people wanted to be like other peoples. They wanted security and political structures like the other countries around instead of living out an alternative counter-cultural position. The church as new Israel should not really be a democracy, nor an autocracy rather a people seeking the will of God as a theocracy.

When that day comes, you will cry out for relief from the king you have chosen, and the LORD will not answer you in that day. But the people refused to listen to Samuel. "No!" they said. "We want a king over us. Then we will be like all the other nations, with a king to lead us and to go out before us and fight our battles." 1 Sam 8:18-20

Prayer in a time of financial crisis

Does insecurity make me more self-seeking and less caring about the needs of others, lessening my humanity, clouding my sense that people matter more than money? Or does this worldwide turmoil strengthen my compassion? Poverty is not good in itself, but where it leads to a deeper dependence on God and coexists with generosity it can be a rare grace www.sacredspace.ie

Learning generosity in a season of financial insecurity is a real challenge. As a global recession dawns there seems to be an invitation to greater compassion. I am grateful for many from whom I have had the chance to learn about being grateful and then generous. To transition from being financially secure to being insecure has been a worry yet now I see people matter more. Friends in trouble and in difficulty count more. Fellow staff struggling in their own financial-support-raising bring from me not mere sympathy but a desire to be generous. Somehow over the years I have noticed the faith of those with less seems so much more authentic than those with more. I still struggle with the financial vulnerability even though I am not really poor but I am dependent on God and others to respond to his call. But I remain challenged by people like Wisnu, a fellow student, who insisted on paying for our lunch because that day he had 20 dollars.

People bemoan the lack of teaching on tithing but perhaps what we need is a greater prophetic voice to remind us that all we are and have is not ours but is held in trust. If we understand God as generous then perhaps we need to also live that out. That is the challenge of the parable of the talents.

'Friend, I am not being unfair to you. Didn't you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the man who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don't I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?' Matt 20:13-15

The greatest Truth

My argument with so much psychoanalysis is the supreme conception that suffering is a mistake or a sign of weakness or a sign even of illness when in fact possibly the greatest truths we know have come out of people's suffering - That the problem is not to undo suffering or to wipe it off the face of the earth but to make it inform our lives Arthur Miller The Century of the Self Episode 2

Recently I got into challenging situation whether my belief we should never paper over or deny another person's pain is essentially correct. Also I think we should never substitute our situation for another's situation. My whole life is the recognition of my own weaknesses and struggles and periods of darkness that permit empathy and sympathy. Yet I will rarely share those periods with others in their struggles because the focus can become me and not them. I've gotten into trouble when others don't see things this way.

I've been watching The Century of the Self, a series of programs at Google Video which tracks the pervasive influence of Sigmund Freud, his daughter Anna and nephew Edward Bernays on propaganda, Public Relations, politics etc.This amazing quote from Arthur Miller, former husband of Marilyn Munroe, presented as part of the backlash against psychoanalysis as it appears she was receiving help from an analyst when she committed suicide.

The last 30 hours have been as emotionally tiring as the last week has been stressfully tiring. Thanksgiving meal for 60 plus people, then an outing using 8 vehicles for 39 people. Yesterday I met an old friend and his wife on the street and ended up stopping for tea and later an early dinner. An amazing catch up after 2 years or so. We talked a lot about the dark side of life - depression and suicide and also of hope and the presence of God. Then I spent time talking with my Auntie Mary working to ensure she will eat enough each day, then talking with my international who in suffering feels very alone and that suffering is meant to make her strong. But didn't realize that in weakness we are made strong in Christ. There were many tears. Then another long call about life direction and the courage to move forwards. Then later another call from a long lost friend seeking prayer for a troubled spirit wanting to be different in his response to life.

I don't know where Miller's understanding comes from but it is deep. Suffering reveals truth if only we can see it. Pain brings forth and reveals our need of God if we would only accept it. But of course the ultimate suffering is revealed in the Passion of Christ, who as the suffering servant reveals Truth. Not as anything abstract nor as anything conceptual but as something factual and relational.

But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed. Isaiah 53:5

More on Zimbabwe

Death is stalking Zimbabwe’s children, as a potentially catastrophic famine gathers momentum. Aid agencies say that half the population, about five million people, face starvation, two-thirds of children are out of school and water shortages have led to deadly cholera outbreaks. Jan Raath Times online

Over the last while I have posted once a month on Zimbabwe, July, August, September and now October. Why can't things get better instead of worse? Even with a supposed power sharing deal brokered by former South African Prime minister, Mbeki, there is no change and my earlier posting (here) doesn't show anything better only now the feared disaster in on the doorstep. The diseases which tell us of hunger, kwashiorkor, marasmus and pellagra, are now easy to see. The Times reports

When Zimbabwe’s Government does spend money on the health sector it does not help the people. Three months ago the Central Bank allocated $5 million (£3 million,) which was used to buy imported cars for the state’s 100 or so specialist doctors.

The number of starving is 5 million, half the population. I can't even get my head around a number like that. Try and imagine 100 of something, your brain can't hold that, but perhaps more than the entire population of your city is starving, not just hungry. How can Mugabe even think about this? We're not just talking about the poor or the peasants anymore. The middle classes are starving and even teachers are joining their pupils in receiving a bowl of basic food porridge. Starvation also heaps coals on the heads of those with HIV/AIDS because the drugs require food and nutrition and a third of the population is infected.

I've been watching the first episode of The Century of the Self which tracks the influence of Freud and his family on Western values and consumerism and propaganda, public relations, and advertising. Freud's basic identification of hidden deep sexual and aggressive forces in the human psyche might be helpful if it hadn't been for his Americanized nephew, Edward Bernays, who promoted fundamentally the sexual material. Humans have deep aggressive tendencies which seems true but surely we should also take seriously the lust for power which even Machiavelli seems not to have fully acknowledged. Politicians seem incapable of truly caring about the people or the citizens rather more about remaining in power or gaining power.

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. Proverbs 25:21

Simplicity and Poverty

... bloggers everywhere will publish posts that discuss poverty in some way. By all posting on the same day we aim to change the conversation that day, to raise awareness, start a global discussion and add momentum to an important cause.

I love it when people around become concerned to buck the trends of the world around me. Tuesday Night prayer meeting was a moment of inspiration. Rather than looking to buy a huge house in suburbia with equally huge mortgage and a need to run at least 2 cars because there is no public transit, life can be different with different goals. We can make a difference however small. Today is Blog Action Day 2008 Poverty. I decided to be part of this because I know some people actually follow my blog. (Click here for the main site)

Ever since I heard Richard Foster speak and read his book The Freedom of Simplicity I have been challenged. Recently I have been blogging and reading about de-cluttering and trying to live more simply. I've been reading the "100 thing challenge" (see here) Dave Bruno is attempting something amazing "By November 12, 2008 I will only have 100 personal things. I will live with only 100 personal things for one full year, until November 12, 2009." This doesn't include shared things with his wife or daughter and the household but it is still challenging.

Also I've been reading Clutter 101: the definitive guide to de-cluttering your life (See here) I learned in reading that if we de-clutter properly, we can save a lot of money because we can become more frugal and careful about what stuff we bring into the home. "Why add to all your existing junk by buying more unnecessary stuff?" But saving money means we might have more disposable income but not necessarily to spend on ourselves. It is said that John Wesley despite increases in income spent no more money than when he was poorer, the rest he gave away.

"However, I must provide for my children." Certainly. But how? By making them rich? ... Leave them enough to live on, not in idleness and luxury, but by honest industry. ... What does it signify, whether you leave behind you ten thousand pounds, or ten thousand shoes and boots? O leave nothing behind you! Send all you have before you into a better world! Lend it, lend it all unto the Lord, and it shall be paid you again! John Wesley Bristol, September 21, 1790.

I learned one thing important, it not always about being cheap. With even my finances sometimes it is better to buy one thing which is good and classic so much as to last many many years rather than the passing fad or trend which is obsolete in the moment. Not to buy that particular on credit helps to aid care and consideration because the time delay allows earnest careful determination.

Somehow it is a fallacy that being a consumer gives jobs and money to the poor. It seems to me an excuse to justify a constant urge to consume and shop. In fact market forces in the capitalist system require greed at an essential component and also to buy from the cheapest producer and not necessarily to be just in getting the right price. Capitalist economics has no loyalty to buyers or consumers, rather only to the company and the company owners whether private or share-owners.

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:3

Yet more on acedia

... the social consequences of acedia's pervasive presence in our consumer-oriented society, where distractions not only divert us from routines like daily psalter readings and housekeeping chores, in which we can find God's presence, but also keep us from recognizing the spiritual impoverishment that results from such habitual scatteredness. Dennis Okholm It's Half-Past Twelve Somewhere

Acedia is not merely slothness, laziness but avoidance seeking distraction. The quotes come from Okholm's review of Kathleen Norris' new book Acedia & Me: A Marriage, Monks, and a Writer's Life, is poignant. and gives a candid outline to the history of the term both across the centuries and her own life.

The danger of a sin like acedia is that it can become "mortal"—that is, it can prevent God's grace from transforming our lives: "When we are convinced that we are beyond the reach of grace, acedia has done its work." That is why Norris correctly places acedia in a category opposed to love, rather than under the heading of mere apathy.

My Anglican tradition has kept in mind both sin as omission and commission, i.e. not doing or doing. Yet these thread raises for me key ideas that to prevent the activity of God in your life is to sin under this definition. Not to allow God to work, whether to decide not to or perhaps not feel the need is a sin a denial of relationship. Thus it is opposed to love not merely the opposite to love. Not even the act of loving another but to the reception of love. Thus acedia denies and reject that God can and does love you and me.

But my eyes are fixed on you, O Sovereign LORD; in you I take refuge—do not give me over to death. Psalm 141:8

People who reflect

The more we become people of action and responsibility in our community, the more we must become people of contemplation. If we do not nurture our deep emotional life in prayer hidden in God, if we do not spend time in silence and if we do not know how to take time from the presence of our brothers and sisters, we risk becoming embittered. It is only to the extent that we nurture our own hearts that we can keep interior freedom. People who are hyperactive, fleeing from their deep selves and their wound, become tyrannical and their exercise of responsibility only creates conflict Jean Vanier, Community and Commitment

L'Arche is a inspiration to us and a challenge. Jean Vanier's vision of community is one of value but conscious that busyness is our worst enemy. Friday I has a good long conversation with a Chinese scholar about love and duty and how they are basically two ways of looking at or two sides of the same thing. We had been talking about schoolmates and where they had ended up and about a family who had given up everything to care for a child with a degenerative muscle disorder instead of sending him off to an institution. I pointed out that frequently humans in every society aren't good at looking after their disadvantaged or disabled even in our own country accessibility is built into building codes. However if no-one had taking the time with Stephen Hawking then theoretical science would be a poorer place. I am not making any comments about his faith or lack of it but he is valued despite disability. Perhaps his disability forced deeper and deeper reflection because he cannot really flee from himself nor distract himself.

We also had cause to look at happiness and discuss its relationship to satisfaction. Life can be disappointing and even cruel. Life circumstances can make us perhaps embarrassed but if we are truly happy then you cannot be ashamed, only embarrassed. We need to nurture our own hearts to find this kind of freedom. This week I've meditated and also contemplated the phrase God's eternal love in 1 Kings 10:9 Strangely I have been singing his love endure for ever for years but the phrase has been partially or completely meaningless until recently when I began to embrace the emotional consequences and the life orientation that flows from that. Perhaps because the Queen of Sheba said this to Solomon is why I pause and wonder. Perhaps because God's love is for all of us.

Because of the LORD's eternal love for Israel, he has made you king, to maintain justice and righteousness. 1 Kings 10:9

Sometimes the unpredictable

Are things really predictable? Odd situations can bring the unexpected. The Daily Telegraph records the incidence where a mouse fed to a viper as a meal instead killed the snake. There is a whole run of unusual stories, a heron which ate a rabbit, a leopard attacking a crocodiles, a seal catching and eating a duck, but the mouse is most unexpected. (read them here)

So good friends have been working in a shanty town and are very aware of expectations. They're taking a well earned break. and back into the Western world with its expectations or lack of them. The husband is a doctor and he has seen his share of miraculous healing when only prayer happened in a third world squalid setting but they're home. “As a doctor, I wanted to get right to the front to watch people as they came forward for prayer. ... One of the most common facial expressions is surprise as sceptics realise their pain really has gone away. Others just dance for joy as faith turns into experience.” He is a medical doctor and has examined the results.

I continue to be challenged in having disappointments in some places and encouragement in others and yet discouragement again and then another unexpected result.faith rides the rollercoaster and wonders about expectations.

Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. Matt 17:20

The Christian will be conscious that a primary allegiance to Jesus shapes us in distinctive ways, and will want to ask what difference a worldview informed by Scripture makes to the teaching and learning of maths, geography, and history as well as the so-called ‘social and emotional aspects of learning’. Christians are citizens of the kingdom of heaven before they are citizens of the United Kingdom, and will recognise that virtues of courage, compassion and honesty look different when they take shape under the lordship of Christ rather than Caesar. Antony Billington Shaping Education

So many key words here bear thinking about, such as 'primary allegiance' or 'recognise virtues look different'. (The picture is of the inside of a cello) My friend Peter wrote this recently :-

I said that our little faith only allows us to live this type of 21st century Western Christian middle-class life of balance. But I lie awake at night wondering what the Church could become if it were willing to let go of its 21st century identity, and if we were willing to let go of our lives and all the things we hang on to.

At our staff meeting this week we in passing we thought about what radical discipleship really is about. One church at least is wondering whether this means less about programming and more the leading of God. I remain unconvinced that that the CEO model is appropriate for Christian organizations as mission statements etc serve as safe boundaries and exclude the prophetic. The real period in Israel's history was not the monarchy but the period of Judges where leaders and prophets came and went as required. It was a period where Israel was different, counter-cultural at least structurally so. Theocracy places power in safer hands and, where the prophetic voice exists and is heeded, also accountability in the right hands.

Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save. When their spirit departs, they return to the ground; on that very day their plans come to nothing. Psalm 146:2-3

More food troubles

Saturday, I was talking with an international looking for work. He was a trained microbiologist and he was despairing about being able to find a job. I was able to assure him that there would be jobs appearing in the food industry. Just follow the news and I notice what a mess there is with food contamination and in particular convenience foods. This week, in the US it was announced that 32 people in 12 different states were sickened with salmonella poisoning after eating precooked, frozen chicken dinners. The problem was failure to note the food was only browned and not cooked throughly and people simply partially microwaved the meals. Then also in Michigan 26 people were identified with E. coli O157:H7, a serious strain with a mortality rate between two and seven per cent. Sadly they shipped the 5lb bags lettuce into Canada and didn't tell Canadian officials about the problem for days.

As food safety continues to be big news, I continue to reflect how much the current issues are connected to convenience and the quick meal. Our lives, in fact seem to run off at a horribly fast speed and I at times I just feel I want to sit down and draw breath. Why do we run ourselves ragged? Life is busy and there are many demands on us. At least I try and eat a freshly cooked meal in a local restaurant sitting at a table and with staff who know me. I try and make it a mealtime rather than a snatched fast food grab.

Today Euge asked the question today who or what is king in our lives? It's not a new question, not at least to me. I've been asking it here in the blog for sometime. But it needs to be asked and constantly asked. When was the last time I was happy to tell others I had sat down for a few hours and spent time with God? Instead I know I have the very real tendency to say that I am so busy for God - I'm just so busy! Maybe I'm busy because I spend too much time on the computer and email and internet. Perhaps I tend to avoid the claims of tidying and ordering my life, seeking to do things for others than for myself. If I want to make sure God is King and be less Martha and more Mary, then what I need to be is less stuck in the doing image and more being with the one who loves me. Ultimately it is not about sacrifice and service but being with the one who loves you.

"Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Luke 10:40-42

A Sense of Justice

Thus, while I accept that granting leave to appeal could appear unfair, it does not amount to a level of unfairness that is contrary to the interests of justice, ... Granting leave to appeal would not violate the conscience of the community. On the contrary, as I have mentioned, the error in the sentences imposed is of a nature such as to require the Attorney General to appeal to ensure that the administration of justice is fairly and properly carried out. The Court of Appeal

I am frequently filled with a sense of injustice listening to court rulings and sentences. In a recent case I found this statement which was very special. In a plea bargain, in exchange for a guilty plea the Toronto Crown Attorney's office agreed not to appeal, however the Attorney General appealed the sentencing. I was amazed to see a sense of justice, as the conscience of the people, removed from contract law. Of course Christians place justice in a different place.

If spirituality is to be authentic it requires a sense of justice and injustice, just as discernment, as an aspect of spirituality looks at good and evil As I sit on my student council at college we have wrestle with justice and social justice issues. After a year we have replaced virtually all the disposable styrofoam cups and plates and plastic utensils with paper or corn based plastics. Not merely a matter of environmentalism but ecojustice and stewardship. I hope this year to raise questions about justice for international students who seem to fund universities with their escalated fees and get limited specialized assistance to enable them to complete their programs. Spirituality is not merely about practices but values and concerns which are divine.

Woe to those who decree unrighteous decrees, Who write misfortune, Which they have prescribed To rob the needy of justice, And to take what is right from the poor of My people, That widows may be their prey, And that they may rob the fatherless. What will you do in the day of punishment, And in the desolation which will come from afar? To whom will you flee for help? And where will you leave your glory? Isaiah 10:1-3

How Building Learn

Buildings never stop changing. Some do it well and become loved. Some do it badly and get worse over time. The difference is intelligent design and intelligent use. Stewart Brand How Buildings Learn

I've just finished watching a series of documentaries called How Building Learn. It's beautifully crafted series written and presented by Stewart Brand. It challenges notions and ideas that buildings are timeless permanent edifices. For instead the problems are frequently, the architects who see they are building monoliths which are there to resist change and time. Literally they are building works of art, rather than utilitarian structures which can change and adapt. While good buildings learn and adapt and reflect the lessons of people who live in them, really bad buildings can only be replaced.

As I look around building in this city I can see that many of the new structures are open to Stewart's criticisms. They are so radical and difficult to adapt and in fact the Lee Chin Crystal has to be modified from the start because of over heating problems because of the quantity of glass. I suspect eventually it will be demolished rather than loved. The new parts of the British Museum are adaptable spaces which ultimately you will forget how it was before because it is so supportive of its function as a place for people. I have rethought a few ideas and concepts because of seeing the series which is fully available at Google Video.

Francis Duffy asserts "Images are everything. What actually happens inside buildings, what the building was for, becomes forgotten." Buildings are not about looking nice but about living in them. My spaces in my apartment are about being functional except at the moment I am dysfunctional at home. I returned to journalling yesterday after a 6 month hiatus. During my time of reflection about what has been happening inside me and what changes have come about, I did a drawing on a pile of things on one of my desk areas. As I looked over the drawing I realized it reflected many aspects of my life at the moment. There is still disorder and dysfunction. A continuation of the great cleanup is required and not to lose moments. New insights mean that everything should have its place and in designing and sorting and arranging the need for adaptivity is important but not at the cost of descending into disorder.

Within my spiritual practices I need my journal because while adaptable to my moods and transitions and changes in basic practice, it asserts an order to changes or being flexible. When I look at the early days it was very heady and thoughtful meditation and analysis of material I was reading. Then as drawing became more important it became a place to open my psyche to myself. I don't know what it will become but my journal will not stop changing in content and style and it will prevent a descent into chaos.

Presuppostions and Preunderstandings

Every people group of different cultures brings their preunderstanding to the biblical text they are reading. ... [However unlike preunderstanding,] Presupposition is not something we want to renegotiate as we read the text. It is different from preunderstanding that need to be changed. Joey @ Missions and Theology

I find Joey's reflection helpful as I have been thinking about the dangers of syncretism in spiritual practices. Objectivity is impossible rather everything in done in relationship with God even the thinking, however there seems to me that there are non-negotiables which Joey names as presuppositions. (read more of these in relationship to the biblical text here)

My friend Carlin's call towards transcendence still keeps me thinking. It is possible even within contemporary rock/pop based Christian worship but calls for a careful craft. two Sundays ago I tried to contribute that aspect within the worship set with my cello in a brief 2 bar solo. I think I managed it for a moment to point to the beyond, the wholly other, God. After all isn't our presupposition that the goal of worship is the recognition of God as God? The problem is that our preunderstandings get in the way and drawn into the mechanics of performance and confusing our meeting the divine with emotionalism. Intimacy with God is inevitably within the mysterious vastness of God otherwise we merely domesticate God down to our size.

Great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised in the city of our God, in the mountain of his holiness. Beautiful for situation, the joy of the whole earth, is mount Zion, on the sides of the north, the city of the great King. God is known in her palaces for a refuge. Psalm 48:1-3

We do not possess the future

The novel ought to be a stout defender of the independence of eschatology in its most robust sense – that is, a defender of the apparently obvious but actually quite vulnerable conviction that the present does not possess the future. Rowan Williams Dostoevsky: Language, Faith, and Fiction

I was reading Ben Myers posting of a quotation from Rowan William's new book. For those less familiar he is the current Archbishop of Canterbury. This quotation really caught me and has started a train of thoughts including that often forgotten passage "continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." (Phil 2:12-13). Relationships are unpredictable and you cannot possess another person nor a relationship. We do not possess the future, nor eternal life as such. These are graced gifts to us and as yet not fully received.

Søren Aabye Kierkegaard as Johannes de Silentio was author of Fear and Trembling and this book has been on my reading list for quite a few years. Kierkegaard was a Christian existentialist reflecting very much about the emptiness in the life of the church around him and struggled with the tensions between faith and reason. In Fear and Trembling he studied the story of Abraham and presented two figures a "Knight of Faith" and a "knight of infinite resignation". The Knight of Faith relinquished everything i.e. was willing to kill Isaac, but also trusted that he would receive him back. This trust was based on the "strength of the absurd". Absurdity is contrary to reason and all faith is viewed as basically absurd. In contrast the knight of infinite resignation gave up everything in return for the infinite. Within this view he hope he may receive redress after this life, and yet continuously dwells with the pain of his loss/sacrifice.

Perhaps you understand my propensity to the Existentialists. Kierkegaard as Silentio seems to admire Abraham's faith, but he is unable to understand it. I live in and understand the tension between the two knights. The present does not posses the future, rather it is held in trust.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Cor 13:11-13

Dangers of reactionism

This narrow banding [of emergent church] often reduce emerging church to aesthetical styles, and pathological axiomatics, of locations and practices. There can be a regular mantra of ‘we have no programs, we are organic, missional, and are participatory’, whilst doing very little that is missional, and beyond therapy spaces for disillusioned Christians... Jason @ Deep Church

One of the issues I have felt with at least some people claiming to be emergent church is the expressed reactionism against something, someone, some style, or tradition. It seems to be Christians reacting against other Christians rather than getting out there and living a life worthy of the Gospel. In other words, words and no authenticity in living counterculturally, living incarnational lives, bring Christ to the world.

The dangers of the latest technology is it becomes a substitute for proficiency and authenticity. Having doesn't mean you can use it well or profitably. I was reading my weekly subscription LICC - Connecting With Culture - Collectors Cornered and was slightly convicted. Nigel Hopper wrote:-

I for one have to confess that I probably already own more CDs than I’ll ever have time to listen to, and have books on my shelves that I’ll never get around to reading, despite my best intentions. ... Has the acquisition of things, and the status that their ownership brings, become more important to us than any actual pleasure they impart?

We have the stuff but it gives no innocent joy or pleasure. Last week I got an email and followup phone call and popped over to friends. I had a little moment of Christmas. a few pieces of smoked salmon and a slice and a half of rich chocolate cake. Nigel notes "There’s nothing wrong, of course, in indulging our passions and enthusiasms. " The problem comes when we indulge and they lose their "innocence and humility". They become obsessive, guilt ridden and objects of pride.

Its not about change, rebelling against something, changing practices or method. It seems more and more about enjoying being with God in every situation every aspect of life. As I continue to try to clean up and get rid of things, its not about the having as such but the pleasure or joy or simple usage that comes form them. In having the cello its about becoming better so I can enjoy playing more and more. In the words of Nodame Cantabile character Kuroki "if we can perform well, we feel happy. If we can perform even better, won't we perhaps be able to enjoy it better as well? To aim higher is perhaps to enjoy music purely [as music]."

I need to get practicing!

Something fundamentally wrong

It is generally believed that BSE, Mad Cow Disease, came cross species when sheep parts we fed to cattle in high protein feeds.

The current milk scandal continues to spread globally the World Health Organization on Friday warned the world to be alert for dairy products of Chinese origin that could be tainted. Now King Car Food Industrial Company of Taiwan has a product recall for 7 products under the Mr. Brown label. They have discovered their nondairy creamer is contaminated with melamine. Yes their mainland Chinese made milk-substitute product has melamine in it! Of course White Rabbit candy is also under caution but nondairy creamer should be milk free, shouldn't it?

Contamination is problem in spirituality. I tend to see new age as fusion spirituality or shopping basket spiritual practice. In an age of consumerism and fads it is not surprising syncretism creeps in. Caution is necessary as is self-consciousness. The uncritical adoption of spiritual practices from other faiths is not merely expressing a consumerist view point but also a form of colonialism. It does not respect another culture by plundering it for useful things to add to our spiritual practice. Somehow I am uncomfortable with things like the use of Tibetan prayer bowls in Christian spiritual practice. On the other hand, I am aware of the excesses of Western Modernity and rationalism which has turned faith into a cognitive process and the learning of good doctrine. Yet we still need to think things through and I remain quite concerned that many around do not question nor consider carefully what they are doing. frequently people follow trends whether cultural or simply other Christians are doing it.

Sabbath is not only about rest but also holiness and being set apart. It is about being different.

We know also that the Son of God has come and has given us understanding, so that we may know him who is true. And we are in him who is true—even in his Son Jesus Christ. He is the true God and eternal life. Dear children, keep yourselves from idols. 1 John 5:20-21

Wearing out

The new school year continues to bring more disappointments than successes. But I can't deny the good moments.

The bike has been giving a little troubel of late. For the last week the chain has been creaking and slipping and finally Friday it broke in the middle of College and St George. Fortunately there was no car hurtling towards me and I was a minute away from BikeChain where I was headed to find out what was wrong with it. I fitted a new chain for 8 dollars. But Saturday no-one turned out for the bike ride, but it was raining...

In 4 years I have worn out 3 tyres, 3 sets of brake pads, one saddle, two sets of pedal bearings,and I have broken 2 bells, 5 wheel spokes on two separate occasions and now one chain. The bike has been worn out because it was been used and not because it was kept safe inside. My veritgo is back because it never went away fully rather because I'm tired and a little worn out. I'm a little disappointed with things this school year but I wouldn't be disappointed if I hadn't tried and trusted. I also wouldn't be able to savour the small moments of success or hope.

Needed a new life including a trade

Many hand operations followed and Paul and his team were feeling rather flushed with success, until one patient came back and said that they had given him "bad hands". The problem was, beggars with deformed and useless hands got money. The ones with good looking, working hands did not. ... That patient challenged Paul to look at the whole man ... Leprosy patients needed a new life including a trade, not just new hands. Sharon Blyth speaking about the late Paul Brand

It's astounding but I've found a website and service called Tourist Remover! (here) The concept is that you'll take a picture and another picture and another and people keep getting in the way. This service will enable you to remove them from the picture. You create something quite nice or even beautiful but it is no longer really a accurate record of what happened or what it was like when you were there. I suppose that we have to be grateful is wasn't Tourist Eliminator!

If life were that simple. But memories and their history are important to us they often tell us who we are both in positive and negative ways. Even most psychotherapies do not attempt to wipeout memories but to reinterpret them. To wish them away is craziness because we need the experiences of life to give true wisdom. Unfortunately most wisdom comes from "the school of hard knocks" the bruises and woundings of life not from the good stuff. I written about Paul Brand and his writing on the importance of pain. He was a surgeon working with leprosy patients and I was taken by books I read many years ago about and by him. Fixing up patients came to mean more than simply getting the body to work or fixing hands, it was far more intentional, and it was far more than saving souls.

Fixing up a photo simply creates a fake which looks good but deny the people and relationships however irritating as people get in the way. WE are called to care for the whole person. You know what trade Paul Brand taught his patents, carpentry. There is a sort of irony and glory in the same moment.

Convenient food

Being a "locavore" and eating foods grown near where you live may not help the environment as much as you might think, according a new study. Mason Inman National Geographic News April 2008

I was born before supermarkets, before freezers and definitely before convenience and prepackaged foods. I remember when food was local because the economic and food technological machinery did not exist. The last few weeks have exposed a fatal weakness in all human systems, namely selfishness and greed. Human beings have tunnel vision and are essentially reductionist, seeing only what they want to see. Food production is never merely about carbon footprint nor about saving time or about profits.

The last few weeks the media has been filled with listereosis and the sliced meats and cheese contamination. We've known for a long time that ground meats are more prone to bacterial contamination, but assumed that cooked and cured meats would be safe. But of course pre-slicing before sales removes that protection. Prepackaged and pre sliced foods are quick and convenient. It removes food preparation from those eating to others making profits.

Now milk intentionally contaminated with melamine is in the news. 53,000 babies and young children affected in a country with a one child policy! But this is not the action of one person or one company as so far 22 companies have been identified as following this dangerous practice of doctoring the milk. But the effect is not localized to once country but across Asia and even North America because globalization means foods travel the world.

Most food in North America travels at least 1500 kilometres to you in fact In the USA, in one meal ingredients may come from five different nations, and in Australia, that might be 30,000 km from farm to stomach. We want strawberries or raspberries in winter so they travel across continents. We're encouraged to eat more fish except we're a long way from the ocean and of course no more than 2 portions a week because of mercury.

In all of this, whoever we are we assume that our governments and officials will look after us. But it's interesting that the politicians are campaigning like fury and spend more time working on negative talk rather than the role of politicians. I was asking myself what I should have said the other night when the local candidate appeared on my door step. Here's a few questions that came to mind this afternoon "If you're elected who will command your loyalty, 1) your party, 2) those who voted for you, or 3) the people living in this neighbourhood?" or "Would you still stand for election if there were no pension and the salary was half that currently?" or "Why do you exactly want to be a politician?"

No government is ever elected on the platform that "We will spend extra millions on testing and confirming the safety of water and food." No government would voted themselves a pay decrease because they did not fulfill promises. Somehow, at the moment, being a politician seems to be another way to convenient food?

Good government has checks and balances to ensure safety and wise practices. In a democratic system this is normatively found in losing an election. The problem, I see, is that pensions and benefits cut in too early and there are really few penalties for a politician who fails to be re-elected. Furthermore government is no longer agent of the peoples rather politicians are in the same category as a used car salesman, you wouldn't trust anything they had to say. Negative campaigning is always unhelpful and unsavory.

Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue. An unfriendly man pursues selfish ends; he defies all sound judgment. Proverbs 17:28 , 18:1