You can surf or search or use the labels to follow a thread of ideas. Imagine in some crazy way you are watching my thoughts evolve, seeing ideas become connected , or observing an amorphous cloud giving birth to sources of light and matter. Treat this place metaphorically as a place of unformed galaxies and planetary systems rather than merely as a diary.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Choose love

How can we choose love when we have experienced so little of it? We choose love by taking small steps of love every time there is an opportunity. A smile, a handshake, a word of encouragement, [etc] ... Each step is like a candle burning in the night. It does not take the darkness away, but it guides us through the darkness. When we look back .... we will discover that we have made a long and beautiful journey. Henri Nouwen Bread for the Journey

I still am experiencing jaw pain both on the right side and left side but perhaps the causes are different. I'm pretty sure the right is due to tmj and grinding my teeth. But the left seems to be in the zone where the tooth extraction took place and maybe I have an infection as the gum is sore to the touch. When I feel the touch of sympathy or feel the loving frustration of being unable to do anything, I can either stay mired in the pain or choose love. When she is in pain with her back I can remain self-focused or choose to be other-focused in love.

God is love. Not God has love but God is love. This could be a philosophical statement that God in essence is love or God as transcendental defines all loves. But I'd like to think every human relationship has the potential to include God and be loving. To choose Love is to choose to include God. Iris and I pray that God will remain the centre of our relationship.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

The National Gallery

I don't know whether I'll regret the action but I did it. We'd already walked through a lot of Canadian art works and went into the European section. There was a surprisingly good collection of French Impressionists and there it was on the wall. My favourite artist Vincent Van Gogh and one of his many Iris paintings and the perfect moment.


I took out of my coin purse a piece of aluminium foil and gave it to her. She thought it was a piece of chocolate but it wasn't. I've been working on this tagua nut carved ring for about 1 month and carved an iris adding a yellow zirconia in the centre. What the future holds I really don't know but my prayer, infact our prayers that God willing we'll come together soon and endeavour to spend our livres together until death do us part.
I knelt down by her watched, by security, in the shadow of the painting which now has special sigificance for us both. And she said yes without hesitation or pause for breath, twice.