darkness, suffering, and dark night

I am beginning to wonder both from reading and experience whether suffering is a necessity for spiritual growth or just an accelerant. Suffering may be ill-health, life crisis, depression or mental illness, self-induced or externally applied.

This last week I have been very aware that our weakness, in my own weakness is really the only opportunity to experience the grace and strength, the power and mercy, the love and assurance that only God can give.

I was reminded again of that in watching the second night of the New Year Special for Nodame Cantabile. Her professor asks Nodame, Why do you play the piano? and Nodame can't answer. She experiences a dark time with streaming tears as she quests for meaning in it all. Initially she is reminded eventually that it is her love and desire to be married to Chiaki is why she is studying piano, but as she rises above that and gives a recital she rediscovers the joys of having others listen and also be inspiring. Her piano performance moves her friends to reach for greater things as well. It takes having things stripped away from us to realize what is important. For us, to lose all is only to find ourselves.

Music and spirituality have a lot in common. We need authentic lives to inspire other, only with knowledge of the darkness can we walk with those in darkness.